Mute Button

Someone should invent a remote control for the TV that has exactly one button on it: the mute button.  I need such an invention desperately, not only to silence the nightly cable news, but also to tune out the continuous commercials for bowel trouble, mesothelioma, E.D., terminal illness, and lawyers. Must I really be forced to endure endless talk of diarrhea while I'm eating breakfast?  Based on the onslaught of ads, this must be the sickest generation, and I'm getting nauseous just thinking about it.