Argus Hamilton Quips

Check out the latest quips from Argus Hamilton, including these:

"Roger Clemens didn't say the brightest thing in his latest denial of steroid use. He claimed that heart problems are hereditary in his family, adding that his step-father died of a heart attack. Perhaps his attorney advised him to plead diminished capacity."

"The Treasury Department admitted that a Social Security computer malfunctioned Friday and sent millions of dollars in stimulus checks to dead people. The stimulus checks are a total waste of money. Even a defibrillator won't bring these people back."